Should We Be Judged By How We Make Others Feel?

JulesKorngold

How we treat others is an important aspect of being a good person. However, it's not the only factor. We should also strive to be honest, responsible, and grow as individuals.

jack

Argument Topic: Should We Be Judged By How We Make Others Feel?

Hello Jules:

Nahh..  I'm responsible for my feelings, and others are responsible for theirs..  If I felt bad every time somebody disagreed with me, I'd never be happy..  And, I feel fine, thank you very much..

excon

just_sayin

We should be judged by the content of our character, no how others feel.  Especially in today's world where someone can get someone else canceled because a truth statement made them feel 'unsafe'.  This world view reduces truth to only things that others agree with.

MayCaesar

Absolutely not. How I feel about a particular kind of person has changed dramatically over my life, as my values and standards evolved, and many people who I thought poorly of 15 years ago I now deeply respect, and vice-versa. My best friend from 8 years ago is someone I would not even want to have a conversation with today, while my best friend today is someone who would have made me extremely insecure had I met him 8 years ago. How you make someone feel depends not only on you, but on them, which already makes judging you based on how you make them feel illogical.

Feelings further strongly depend on the cultural context. An American seeing someone with their feet on the desk in most cases would not think much of it, while an Iranian seeing that would think that the person is the most despicable scoundrel there is. An American seeing a beautiful woman wearing nothing but a t-string and a bikini on a beach would enjoy the view, while an Iranian would be extremely outraged.

It is an absolutely wrong way to go about life to constantly second-guess yourself based on what people around you might think, and it is equally wrong to expect other people to second-guess themselves based on what you might think. It is much more important to live in alignment with your values, and if the rest of the world hates you for it, yet you are firmly grounded in your values, then you are good.